Semi-lethal tortillas

Vagabond Tim

It tasted like mesquite and pain.

So the other day a friend of mine got one of these Carolina Reaper Tortilla things.
I could say I have a high tolerance for spicy but that implies that at least on some level I am not enjoying it. I love the way spicy hurts, so I figured what the hell and agreed to eat this chip. I was advised to use a plastic bag in case it touches my skin…
That is not the kind of thing one wants to hear before putting something in their mouth.

Being that I had talked shit about the people in the video linked above I wasn’t going to let a little thing like common sense deter me from risking potentially serious injury for a mildly entertaining story.
Upon opening the box I discovered that the chip itself was contained in some kind of insulative package, presumably to prevent it from dissolving the cardboard. Within this airtight hannibal cage was a chip that looked and smelled perfectly ordinary, perhaps a little like bbq. Without giving it much thought I tossed the chip in its entirety into my mouth. My initial assessment was that it tasted like wood and bbq, mesquite is probably the best way to describe it.

Oh, also it hurt. Quite a bit. I’ve broken quite a few bones in my life and I would say the level of pain I was in was pretty comparable. I can completely understand how someone not accustomed to extremely painful things for the entertainment of others would weep and beg for death. Personally I want more of them…


They come in a coffin for effect


It may or may not have been a scene like this…

One Comment

  1. Claire
    November 5, 2016 at 00:09

    You’re crazy!

Leave a Reply

Your message*

You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>